J-School is no joke

It's 12:30 and I have no idea why I'm awake. 

I was at school yesterday until FIVE-THIRTY IN THE MORNING working on my final. Came home, slept for three hours, showered for the first time in like three days and came back to school. 

I made the deadline but I'm not happy with the work. 

It could have been better and I could have worked harder. 

I really care about my topic and I want to revisit it when I can do it justice, but right now I feel like never want to look at my final again. 

I just spent like every free hour of the last week thinking about, writing about, listening to interviews about, or coding a website about multiracial young adults - who are half white - and their thoughts on white privilege. 

It was an interesting idea but I don't think I executed it well. 

Journalism graduate programs are no joke. If I had to pick between and accelerated program and a two year or even one and a half, I would take the extended one. It's not even the workload but that I can't learn everything that I want to and produce work that I feel is good. 

I feel like I spent this semester sucking at everything and maybe next semester it will be alright. But I wanted to walk out of a master's program with my life together and feel like a real adult and professional. 

I mean, the workload is crazy too. In college when I thought I was 110% committed to photojournalism, I never worked this hard, except for maybe my senior project - which I also finished in a panic. 

All of the master of science students were taking at least five classes or "labs" AKA working in the media center/newsroom. I was doing eight.

I feel like an insane person, but at the same time I know I'm enjoying it because if I were a little bit unhappy to be there I would be SO unhappy and grumpy.

I know I just spent like 10 minutes complaining but I'm glad I'm here. I would have never been able to teach myself any of this and the opportunities you can take advantage of are awesome. I don't have time right now but I'm going to try when it's closer to graduation. 

Less procrastination in the spring. However, I know that's how I'm most productive, so I'm not giving myself permission to procrastinate but it's an annoying thing to realize and think of as like a weird safety net.

I'm working on a documentary next semester. I'm going to work on cutting a fake sizzle reel. I did the interviews but the visuals are not mine. So obviously this is just an exercise for the pre-production class and if I want to make a real one I'll have to do it when I start shooting, but I'm having fun. 

Hello world!

My, my! It has been a while since I've been active here!

USC has been crazy. I can't believe it's already October, but at the same time, it definitely feels like October. 

We have been working like crazy since July and it has not let up. I hope to be able to have some good work to show for myself by December.

I will say though, I feel alright about my midterm. It was totally falling apart and somehow I got it together at the last minute. I didn't take any photos though so that's a little disappointing. It's called "Mental health care and L.A. County jails: Are there resources to rejoin society?" and looks at some reentry services for those coming out of incarceration.

I'm really excited about the spring semester though. I have a crazy workload and am going to be an insane person but I'm ready for it. 

I really like the community here. There is a professor/photographer who is really supportive and seems to think my purpose on earth is to be a mental health reporter. I haven't formed an opinion about it but it's nice that he believes so strongly in us.

I hope to update my website more often. Stay tuned. 

Doing some freelance

In the last couple of weeks I have been doing more freelance than usual. I don't freelance often - but recently it seemed like an alright idea to take these jobs while I'm waiting for school to start. 

So I've been in Pittsburgh for the last few days and it's been really nice seeing family. But coming here made me realize how much juggling full-time freelancers have to do to keep their income flowing. There are invoices to be generated, W-9s to be filled out, and people to remind - or harass - for responses, payment or any other thing. 

I brought some camera stuff and had all these plans with my sister to photograph everyone all week but I probably took 10 pictures and carried it around for no reason. Maybe if I were alone to explore I'd use my camera more but we're being shuffled to BINGO games and family events.

I'm glad that when I get back I have a little more than two weeks to get ready for school. I think doing this freelancing all at once has helped get some of that rust off before we do our month-long immersion. J-school here I come.